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$$$$ NOTES FROM UNDERGROUND  FYODOR DOSTOEVSKY
$$$$ PART ONE ; UNDERGROUND
$$$ I
I am a sick man ... I am a spiteful man . I am an unpleasant                3
man . I think my liver is diseased . However , I
don't know beans about my disease , and I am not sure
what is bothering me . I don't treat it and never have ,
though I respect medicine and doctors . Besides , I am
extremely superstitious , let's say sufficiently so to respect
medicine . ( I am educated enough not to be superstitious ,
but I am . ) No , I refuse to treat it out of spite . You probably
will not understand that . Well , but I# understand it .
Of course , I can't explain to you just whom I am annoying
in this case by my spite . I am perfectly well aware
that I cannot " get even " with the doctors by not consulting
them . I know better than anyone that I thereby
injure only myself and no one else . But , still , if I don't
treat it , it is out of spite . My liver is bad , well then -- let
it get even worse ]]
   I ha . . .